Ten Years...and no longer a "wee one",,,

Ten years ago, I became a parent, specifically a mother. I was 18 with nothing but hope and pride to provide for my young child, and yet, they let me leave the hospital with him! God handed me a miracle that day, and it's been such an adventure ever since.

When you have your first child, everyone is full of advice, and a new mother walks a fine line between listening and figuring things out for herself...blundering or struggling though it until a system is achieved. Everything was amazing every facial movement and detail caused awe, each cry...didn't create panic, but a sense of discovery.

Two months or so after Kainan was born, the events of September 11th rocked my parental world. That morning, I had put him on a blanket on the floor near the T.V. then turned it on. Just as the picture came into focus, the 2nd plane hit. I was struck at the irony of the images I was witnessing. There is my son, an innocent, and right behind him on the screen the result of pure evil. I couldn't help but wonder what on EARTH I had brought this poor baby into. The future seemed even MORE uncertain than usual...and it was the moment that I snapped out of my parental bliss and got to business always trying my best to provide the best I could for my family.

I now, 10 years later, have full conversations with my boy, who is capable of so many wondrous things. He's funny, smart and has the biggest of hearts! So, today, I no longer can use my usual term of endearment for my oldest boy...he's no longer a "wee one". He's a young man! It's been especially emotional for me to have a kid in the double digits and now I get why my mother cried at all those moments that as a kid I didn't understand. Now I do, it's your heart pouring over...

Ode to Friendship

From day one of our interesting friendship Ash and I have had laughter, tears, joy and unmeasurable sadness. We started off a little inconsistent until our music, faith and sense of fun were just too alike to avoid! From the early days of spending the night and driving around with our toothpick umbrella situated juuuust so, so the radio would work in Ol' Rusty, to the mad dash through Brown County to Ash's finial wedding, we have seen it all!

I have never had much time for most other chicks...why? Well, girls are stupid. Petty and generally so competitive that they are a waste of time in my opinion. The thing that I value the absolute most is the unconditional love and support that I share with my best friend. I know, that no matter what I can call on her to bring me back around, give an opinion or solution without judgement. My biggest hope is that I provide the same for her. It's been extremely hard on me to have her gone, I struggle about that because it's selfish, but I have yet to find a person here that has the qualities of character that I am looking for in a friend...does that sound lame?

I have given it a good couple of shots and every time I find someone remotely promising, I either scare them off with my weirdness or they move away due to them getting amazing opportunities. It's all just a waste of time. There's only one Aiiishal. I hope that my boys will have the opportunity to have friends that are this close, to build memories that they can hold close and dear...memories that help build them into the adults they will become.